Sweater drugs - more common than you think

Watch out worrisome parents;  USP’s are on a rampant rise.

Across America, college girls and guys are beginning to discover the latest in non-medicinal, recreational uppers.  Made out of wool, or sometimes cotton, this new drug has the power to evoke raucous laughter, feelings of delirium and frolicking akin to the second-coming of Dionysus.

Like a world in which pigeons swim and fishes fly, this drug is different.  You do not swallow this drug; you don’t inject it with a syringe.  Instead you wear it, proud and true, like a symbol of youthful rebellion.

This new inhabitant is innocuous; invisible to the untrained eye.  Disguised to look like an every-day piece of clothing, this new scourge on society is untraceable; airport detectors and K-9 units are powerless to act.

The drug in question is ugly sweaters.

Students have been seen clad in these banal raiments; dancing around, howling at the moon and having mass-unprotected sex outside dorm rooms from Boca Raton to Venice Beach.  Some of the most potent strains of this trenchant drug tend to be emblazoned with tall green trees covered with lights, strange snow-creatures and a fat, bearded paedophile in a red suit.

Beware of any group of youths wearing these evil sweaters, as they will surely consume your being with their witchcraft and turn you to the dark side of ugly sweater tomfoolery!

If however, you like the idea of a legal drug that will bring life to any holday party, visit buy ugly sweaters dot com for the finest selection of racusly ugly sweaters to be found anywhere in the modern world!

Ugly sweater addicts

Ugly Halloween sweater

Christmas is right around the corner, and the holiday season is creeping up on us like a one-elephant-band in a pink leotard.

By now, I’m sure you have all begun planning your ugly Christmas sweater parties - inviting guests, arranging catering and organizing the petting zoo are all important parts of the planning mechanism.  However, the most important part of planning an ugly sweater party is the sweaters themselves.

It’s September.  Soon it will be October and Halloween, then Thanksgiving and before you know it, Christmas.  Now is the time to act on your ugly sweater impulses.  Get them while the selection is strong, while the prices match the demand.  Come November, the demand will skyrocket, as will the asking price.

Buy ugly sweaters dot com is the best place to shop for ugly sweaters for all occasions.  We have ugly Halloween sweaters, ugly Christmas sweaters, ugly sweaters for dogs and ugly sweaters for every day spontanaety.

Looking for a button up cardigan with an evil pumpkin and flying witch on the front? We got it.

Looking for a conga line of sexually deprived, erotic teddy bears? We got a sweater with that scene on it’s neckline, too.

Sexually teddy ugly sweater

What I’m saying is, in order to impress your friends with the perfect sweater party, send them somewhere you have absolutely nothing to do with - buy ugly sweaters dot com.  We get their business and you get their adoration and appreciation.

So don’t sit around; get on buy ugly sweaters and kick your holiday season off with a bang at the best value possible.

buy ugly sweaters dot com - Git you some!

These people should have gone to buy ugly sweaters

We have noticed many pictures of christmas sweater parties from years gone by popping up on the internet.  They’re nice and all and they give us hope that ugly sweater parties are really catching on.  It’s just the sweaters aren’t that ugly.

You see, if you simply visit a thrift store for your ugly sweater needs you are limited to what they have in stock - likely mothball-ridden XL hand-me-downs.  You will overpay, likely $10 - $12, and will be unhappy with your sweater.  You will then arrive at the party with your other thriftstore friends and will likely have a terrible time and possibly ruin Christmas.

Lesson learned:  For ugly christmas sweaters there is only one real option - visit buy ugly sweaters dot com!

We offer the most diverse range of ugly and holiday sweaters anywhere in the internet and we deliver free of charge.  So browse the site; try to pick one that stands out from the rest and grace your body with one of the the ugliest christmas sweaters in the world!

The 2010 edition of The Farmers’ Almanac is predicting a blisteringly cold winter for most Americans, which could be a good sign for the ugly sweater business.

The periodical journal, which goes on sale Tuesday, predicts freezing temperatures across the nation, from the Rocky Mountains to the East Coast, in what they believe could be one of the harshest winters in recent memory.

“It’s going to be an ice cold sandwich,” says managing editor Sandi Duncan, “the middle part of the country’s really going to be cold — very, very cold, very, very frigid, with a lot of snow.”

The almanac, which has been published since 1818, issues annual forecasts using a formula based on astronomy, more specifically sunspots, planetary positions and the effects of the moon.

This year the journal predicts a cool, snowy winter for the Northeast while the Great Lakes states face an arctic-style chill.  The rest of the country will be less harsh but still below average.

So what does this mean for the ugly sweater busines?  Well, it’s great, of course!  While you will no doubt be toiling in a winter wonderland, the promise of the most prolific ugly sweater season ever is a mouthwatering prospect.  Ugly sweaters, while lacking great innovation or high-tech materials, serve to keep the wearer and and all in his presence warm.  When a truly ugly sweater enters the room it brings with it a heavenly glow.  Everyone around lightens up, pointing and chuckling at the hideous garment.

The wearer then gets surrounded by the jealous mob and may even break a sweat as the hot breath of the group closes in.

Of course the wearer runs the risk of sweater-envy, an affliction that affects around 30% of ugly sweater owners.  The problem is some people just get so excited when they see an ugly sweater that they just cannot control themselves.  instantly they become enraged, driven by the inadequecies of their own stylish wardrobes.

So, for the impending freeze this winter, get yourself a thick ugly sweater… Just get some for your buddies as well.

Some people are resourceful, and others are the lovechild of Martha Stewart and Wolfgang Puck.  Randy, the part-time ugly sweater model is of this rare breed.  She can sew, pose, accessorize, and clean her teeth to a gleaming pearl hue.   Watch out Bob Vila, she can also hang decorative plates.

Randy, the resourceful part-time sweater model

She’s taken every step to solidify her place in Christmas sweater history with the following:

1.  Candy striped stockings

2. Antlers from the infamous ‘Red’ Reindeer

3. A big bird rivaling smile

Randy, you have not only made us proud, but also given hope to sweater wearers the world over.

Please leave your compliments of her outfit below.

If you are interested in us featuring your sweater photo, you can contact us at buyuglysweaters@gmail.com

In this most modern of times one might have expected us to move foreward in the technology of our clothes.  20 years ago it would have been normal to picture people in 2009 wearing shiny, silver cat suits with round, fish-bowl style oxygen helmets.  We were supposed to be futuristic and so were our clothes.  These outfits would protect us from heat, cold and meteorites while looking stylish and effortless.

However, something much, much better has occured — the return of the ugly sweater.

Ugly sweaters have been around for half a century.  Bill cosby gave them life and social acceptance in the 1980’s but by the late 90’s they were as rare as a rocking horse’s shit.

The truth is we got too cool for them.  Their zig-zags, stripes, snowmen and Christmas trees were not fasionable enough in a world dominated by Nike tracksuits, kipper ties and baggy jeans.  What a terrible era.

Now though, we have seen the light.  Ugly sweaters are back and this time they are here to stay.  Ugly Christmas sweater parties have boomed over recent years and ugly sweaters have, once again, become great holliday gifts.  Heck, even celbrities like Chris Brown and Sarah Jessica Parker have been seen sporting ugly sweaters.

They love them, we love them and we’re sure you will love yours too!

so visit buy ugly sweaters dot com and get your ugly sweater from the guys who do it best!!

Wearing an ugly sweater is a total experience. Laura (as seen below) is not only wearing a pristine ugly sweater, but she has also done a fantastic job of accessorizing the rest of her outfit. Note the matching stockings and lovely headband. Laura also made mention that this was a champion outfit at her sweater party. She is a well deserved ‘best dressed’ recipient.

Laura models her red and green xmas sweater

If you would like to congratulate Laura, you can do so at: twitter.com/lauracothran

If you are interested in us featuring your sweater photo, you can contact us at buyuglysweaters@gmail.com

Chris Brown apologized to Rihanna in an ugly sweater

Chris Brown wears ugly sweaters!

During a publicly aired apology for his involvement in Rihanna’s assault, rapper Chris Brown can be seen wearing a truly horrific red ugly sweater!

The ensemble is not dissimilar to a chef’s button up shirt and is made of the brightest red material.  Maybe he stained it the night he (allegedly) beat up his girlfriend.  One thing is for sure though, that Chris Brown is an ugly sweater guy!

We don’t wat to say that Chris Brown is an official representitive for Buy Ugly Sweaters, but he can certainly be an unofficial one.  With his impeccable taste for ghastly sweaters, even outside of Christmas time, Chris Brown is a trend setter and an example to all who wish to plan ugly sweater parties in the future!

Of course, in the spirit of Mr. Brown we had to do something special; so we launched the ‘Chris Brown Apology Sweater’ in response:

The Chris Brown Apology Sweater Now available