Here at Buy Ugly Sweaters, we are constantly trying to bring you, the consumers, the ugliest, most outrageous sweaters on this great planet. Today, on our sister blog site, we shall be looking to bring you a countdown of our ugliest available sweaters.
Please, sit back and behold the ugliness.
Vomit bucket is suggested.
This sweater is the epitome of ugliness. it is teal, a bad color to begin with, and has pink details. The back to back doves represent what will happen in your life if you ever wear this horriffic garment – everyone you love will turn their back to you!
UGLY SWEATER RANK: #3
This sweater takes you away to a North Jersey race track. As the dancing smoke of a million Marlboro Red’s fill your senses, you notice a woman in the corner of the room. She is playing Keno, betting on horses and filling out Jai-Alai pick ‘ems. She is wearing a sweater that screams glorious degredation, rampant gambling addiction and self loathing.
UGLY SWEATER RANK: #2
If you buy this sweater this is what you will represent. You will have the ugliest sweater at the party, unless…….
Here it is. The grand daddy. The big aristotle. The country charm? It’s hardly the most frightening name for a sweater, but do not let it fool you. the only people that would ever wear this ugly sweater are unassuming, cold hearted serial killers.
The only thing that could ever scare the Keno sweatered lady is the person that wears this monstrosity. This person would have to be a sick, dimented individual with a taste for blood. You would never know it to look at them in the day time, the pinks and yellows and hearts drawing you into a false sense of security. But at night the person who wears this baby is nothing short of lethal.
It’s leather face meets the shining. It’s Darth Vader meets Freddy Kruger, and all accomplished in a pink cardigan.
UGLY SWEATER RANK: #1